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Regret |Poetry
Regret | Poetry
A Life Bounded With Regret,
Each Regret Always a Secret,
The Regrets neither knew nor described,
It was Only Later that they are realized
Regrets always hard to refrain,
Difficult to sustain
Still remains its effect
In the small looking heart
The regrets of life,
We desired to live.
Regrets of the dream,
We dream to achieve.
The regret of the idea,
We thought to pursue.
Regrets of the pain,
We wanted to rescue.
Regrets Of the laugh,
Which did last for a short while,
Regrets of pleasures,
Which ended in no time.
The regrets of loss,
The loss of love,
The feel to love,
The feel to be loved.
Regrets of the efforts,
Which could have been more,
Regrets of the problems,
Which could have been solved.
Regrets of the feel,
Which could have been felt
And Lastly
Regrets of the End,
Which could have been changed.
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I do not trust love because of my parents | Life Blog | The Times of India
Life Blog | The Times of India |I do not trust love because of my parents
The beginning
I am 25, single and have all sorts of experiences in my kitty. At this juncture, my mother is in a hurry to find a suitable girl for me and get me hitched. But perhaps, I am not ready for it. Not that I am not stable in life or have any other issue, but because I fear love. The fear that has been instilled in my heart and mind because of what I have witnessed in life.
My family…
My father is hale and hearty, and he is rich too! But he does not stay with me and my mother. They got divorced when I was about to step into my twenties. Rarely does he visit us and vice versa? After parting ways with my mother, he re-married while my mother took my responsibility and remained single.
My parents met during their struggling days. Belonging to different communities meant difficulty in getting married, but anyhow, they did. Years passed, and with the passage of time, they found that things weren’t working out the way they wanted them to. Hence, they got separated.
I feel that in this era, where relationships are based on some terms and conditions and reality is hidden under the mask of understanding if your relationship loses that zeal and the stubbornness that holds two persons together, then staying together doesn’t make sense.
The beginning of the end…
In this light, I find my parents’ decision to be fairly practical. I do not blame them. It is a different thing than being a child I never wanted them to be apart. But again, divorce is like a grave disease that doesn’t show up until the final stage is reached. And unfortunately, the moment it reveals itself to you, nothing can be done to reverse its effect.
I felt low; cried for months. I tried to divert myself towards other things when I saw my mother’s mental trauma. The pain she went through, the emotions in her eyes were something I cannot explain in words. Later, the hardships of life and my own relationships made me look at my parents’ decision from a different perspective altogether.
After effects !!
I lost all the love I had in me. Got into three beautiful relationships, and while all of them looked long-lasting, they ended in ways I never thought they will. I ended each one of them. As things became clearer, smoother, I pulled myself back from making a commitment.
I loved them, wanted them to last long, but the word ‘commitment’ gave me goosebumps. At times I thought I wasn’t cut out for it. I craved for love, but whenever I got it, I got confused. I used to distance myself from it, excusing the distance to boredom. Perhaps this was the way I tried to deceive myself from the fear of relationships. I don’t deny my mistakes, but the face of the lady who raised me up and seeing the dearth of love in her life made me more cautious. It prevented me from loving someone to the extent of getting hurt.
I was 19 when that incident hit me, I wasn’t mature enough to understand its cause or its implications.
Conclusion…
I am a changed man now. and believe in living in the present and I don’t think much of what happened and accept it as an unfortunate past which has been associated with me and I no longer regret it. Occasionally, I meet my dad, we discuss a lot of things and end our meetings quite casually. But sometimes, seeing my mother hide her grief behind a smile and the sense of loneliness in her eyes makes me hate the fate bestowed upon her.
But I don’t hate love now. I do hate my past fear of commitment, but seeing society and living with different people, I’ve realized that the love I have seen is an exception to the real one. The beauty of love lies somewhere outside the one that existed between my parents. I have definitely lost the love in me for people, but am searching for it within myself again.
@ramtajogi
Published in The Times of India
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Friendship | English Poetry
Friendship | English Poetry
I don’t know how?
I don’t know what?
The only thing I understand is that those are my soul-part
To those who were there to believe,
To those who were my relief,
Those who faced life as I did,
Who believed in the life I lived,
Laughed at me, who laughed with me,
Who planned their life with my destiny,
Gave me stress, who gave me pain,
Who were there to balance for the same
Stood for me, never misunderstood me,
Who taught me to live, taught me to love,
Taught me to be strong, In any way, the life evolves,
To those, who promised me to be there,
Whenever life gets difficult to bear
Who taught me the meaning of FRIENDSHIP then
Taught me that life just better when travelled in the same ship,
I don’t know life would have been what?
Better or fair?
IF you were not there?
But neither do I need to think that, nor did I want to care?
Because you were, you are and you will be there.
Friendship | English Poetry
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The Desire | Poetry
The Desire | English Poetry
In a life full of frustration,Each one living here has more and more ambitions,
Some want to love, some wants feel,
Someone wants to make big, some want to heal,
Someone wants to dance, someone wants to sing,
Everyone wants something,
That might not have been heard or seen,
Each one is able, Everyone is capable,
To dance, to sing, to act and to think.
But why it still goes flat?
Why only a few climb the heights, the rest just rest.
It’s because of,
THE DESIRE
The desire, the need,
The desperation, the greed,
Is what makes you succeed.
It’s the climbing hard in the night when others sleep,
It’s when others take rest, you take a leap.
It’s when others just think and you actually act,
When others find it hard, you easily adapt.
When others give up, you give in.
Believing your work –worth believing,
Neither the noise of insult effects nor the applause of praise,
You just go on, giving what your work demands,
With a content heart and smile on your face.
You work for your work, you live for it,
You want it to succeed, you give for it
It’s in your manner, in your act,
In your character, in your deed
That desperation, that greed
That desire, that need
That makes you succeed.
@ramta jogi
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I am I | Poetry
I am I | Poetry | English
To the world which praises me high,
The people who blame me hard,
Those who consider me great,
And to them who make me feel apart,
To all those views that people share,
To them, this is what I think,
This is what I care,
I was, I am and I will be the same,
The person in me, unaffected by the name.
In me, I believe,
For my soul, I live.
My thoughts guide me,
My acts define me
I have a life and I live for it,
….
Untouched of what it might lead to being.
Today is what for I am known
Yesterday is not for regret, It’s gone
Tomorrow is not today so I leave it alone.
We are here together,
But what’s our fate?
Believe or not,
But I exist to you till we relate,
Once over, It will be no one.
You, me and everybody will be unknown
In the crowd, we will be on our own,
Searching for ourselves,
To understand and to be known.
Neither the memories will work, nor the feelings will react,
The time once gone, Is better to forget,
I Have rules, I have ethics
I follow them, I repeat, I avoid them or I leave
That’s up to me and that’s my wish
What you think is not what I care
The pressure of your thoughts is not what I bear
I say what I feel,
It may hurt you or it may heal
I am blunt, I dare,
I talk with honesty, and that’s rare.
You, we are particles of clay,
Made to exist and then decay
We are here, to run,
Once over, we are done.
Lone we came, Lone will be the End
None shared the birth,
None will share the death
It is hard but a Fact.
I know this and I feel it.,
So I don’t just leave life instead I live it.
@ramta jogiI am I | Poetry | English
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