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My Family Ignore The Messages Wishing ‘Happy Women’s Day’ | Life Blog
Happy Women’s Day | Life Blog |
Like any other morning, this morning started with the usual course of activities at our home. It was a pretty normal day for me and everyone else in the house. They began their work and I started mine. We had breakfast together and dispersed off on our routines.
So what’s the difference between today and any other day?
Just a few additional things happened today. The inbox of these women was flooded with some 40 odd messages. The newspapers, both online and offline, were full of articles portraying different perceptions people held for this day. Facebook was full of images with the message of “Happy Women’s Day” and about a hundred women tagged on each of them.
My family..
My mother saw the messages, but didn’t reply, instead she put the phone aside and went to the kitchen. Sister marked each one of the messages and deleted them all at once. My crush didn’t even bother opening them. She preferred being offline. All of them untagged themselves from those posts on social media.
It is not that they don’t respect the achievements of women and their contribution to the world; or that they don’t appreciate initiatives for women empowerment. But making women feel so very important and special on this particular day through messages and wishes and labelling this day as the “International Women’s Day” just doesn’t suit their, or my, understanding.
Sitting with them and talking to them about this day made me realize the fact that making them feel special on this day is irrelevant. By showing unusual respect, or taking them out for dinner, gifting them the things they love is not really something they would necessarily like. These things are just meant to pretend to the outer world; that we have a positive approach towards women and we respect them and treat them with equality. But what we fail to realize is that just showing isn’t equivalent to feeling the same from the core of our hearts.
8th of March
Has been marked as “International Women’s Day” since the 1900s to celebrate the social, economic, cultural and political achievements of women. The day also marks a call to action for accelerating gender parity. However, the sensitivity that is associated with the issue of women empowerment and parity can be judged from the fact that it’s been over a hundred years and we still need a “Women’s Day” to respect women and treat them well. Whereas, it is the approach towards women for the entire year that should define the celebration of this day on the 8th of March.
Let’s all question ourselves – are women safe and secure around us? Are they given rights equal to men? If yes, then are they actually able to exercise those rights? Do we treat them equally in our minds and hearts as well? And, will women be treated better for the rest of the year until the next women’s day?
Conclusion
Trying to answer these questions yields more doubts in our minds rather than answers. Hence, we avoid them. The fact that we don’t have answers to these questions signifies; how “happy” this day must be for the women around us.
The entire year goes in satisfying the ‘male’ ego. Satisfying the urge of being the ‘superior’ gender through rapes, molestation and public humiliations. Suddenly on the 8th of March, we treat the same “inferior” gender as goddesses!Birthdays are not celebrated only because you were born on that day; but also because you survived a year more and for all the learning and understandings you developed in that year. Similarly, we forget that the entire year, women have been treated badly. Whether we consider it at national platforms or even at our homes.
People argue that women are being treated well and are being given equal opportunities; on the basis of a sample space that hardly forms 5-10 per cent of the entire population. But what they neglect is the way they are treated in the rest of the space. Providing a handful of women with opportunities and a stand in the society; when a majority is being objectified or a means to get a dowry, and are being deprived of even the basic human rights is not something to be termed as women empowerment and felt proud of.
Observation
Do the wishes count? Do they change the perception and understanding of men towards women? Does the standing of women in society become the way she wants it to be? and not the way the egoistic male wants? When the answer to all of them is No, then how can we say that the wishes of a happy women’s day are even valid? It is all a myth.
A day cannot solve the plight of women in the mind of the entire society. What I contend is that we should mend our behaviour in a way that we no longer need the crutch of a “Women’s Day” to treat females fairly and equally.
Published on: Youth Ki Awaaz
Happy Women’s Day | Life Blog |
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Regret |Poetry
Regret | Poetry
A Life Bounded With Regret,
Each Regret Always a Secret,
The Regrets neither knew nor described,
It was Only Later that they are realized
Regrets always hard to refrain,
Difficult to sustain
Still remains its effect
In the small looking heart
The regrets of life,
We desired to live.
Regrets of the dream,
We dream to achieve.
The regret of the idea,
We thought to pursue.
Regrets of the pain,
We wanted to rescue.
Regrets Of the laugh,
Which did last for a short while,
Regrets of pleasures,
Which ended in no time.
The regrets of loss,
The loss of love,
The feel to love,
The feel to be loved.
Regrets of the efforts,
Which could have been more,
Regrets of the problems,
Which could have been solved.
Regrets of the feel,
Which could have been felt
And Lastly
Regrets of the End,
Which could have been changed.
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I do not trust love because of my parents | Life Blog | The Times of India
Life Blog | The Times of India |I do not trust love because of my parents
The beginning
I am 25, single and have all sorts of experiences in my kitty. At this juncture, my mother is in a hurry to find a suitable girl for me and get me hitched. But perhaps, I am not ready for it. Not that I am not stable in life or have any other issue, but because I fear love. The fear that has been instilled in my heart and mind because of what I have witnessed in life.
My family…
My father is hale and hearty, and he is rich too! But he does not stay with me and my mother. They got divorced when I was about to step into my twenties. Rarely does he visit us and vice versa? After parting ways with my mother, he re-married while my mother took my responsibility and remained single.
My parents met during their struggling days. Belonging to different communities meant difficulty in getting married, but anyhow, they did. Years passed, and with the passage of time, they found that things weren’t working out the way they wanted them to. Hence, they got separated.
I feel that in this era, where relationships are based on some terms and conditions and reality is hidden under the mask of understanding if your relationship loses that zeal and the stubbornness that holds two persons together, then staying together doesn’t make sense.
The beginning of the end…
In this light, I find my parents’ decision to be fairly practical. I do not blame them. It is a different thing than being a child I never wanted them to be apart. But again, divorce is like a grave disease that doesn’t show up until the final stage is reached. And unfortunately, the moment it reveals itself to you, nothing can be done to reverse its effect.
I felt low; cried for months. I tried to divert myself towards other things when I saw my mother’s mental trauma. The pain she went through, the emotions in her eyes were something I cannot explain in words. Later, the hardships of life and my own relationships made me look at my parents’ decision from a different perspective altogether.
After effects !!
I lost all the love I had in me. Got into three beautiful relationships, and while all of them looked long-lasting, they ended in ways I never thought they will. I ended each one of them. As things became clearer, smoother, I pulled myself back from making a commitment.
I loved them, wanted them to last long, but the word ‘commitment’ gave me goosebumps. At times I thought I wasn’t cut out for it. I craved for love, but whenever I got it, I got confused. I used to distance myself from it, excusing the distance to boredom. Perhaps this was the way I tried to deceive myself from the fear of relationships. I don’t deny my mistakes, but the face of the lady who raised me up and seeing the dearth of love in her life made me more cautious. It prevented me from loving someone to the extent of getting hurt.
I was 19 when that incident hit me, I wasn’t mature enough to understand its cause or its implications.
Conclusion…
I am a changed man now. and believe in living in the present and I don’t think much of what happened and accept it as an unfortunate past which has been associated with me and I no longer regret it. Occasionally, I meet my dad, we discuss a lot of things and end our meetings quite casually. But sometimes, seeing my mother hide her grief behind a smile and the sense of loneliness in her eyes makes me hate the fate bestowed upon her.
But I don’t hate love now. I do hate my past fear of commitment, but seeing society and living with different people, I’ve realized that the love I have seen is an exception to the real one. The beauty of love lies somewhere outside the one that existed between my parents. I have definitely lost the love in me for people, but am searching for it within myself again.
@ramtajogi
Published in The Times of India
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Friendship | English Poetry
Friendship | English Poetry
I don’t know how?
I don’t know what?
The only thing I understand is that those are my soul-part
To those who were there to believe,
To those who were my relief,
Those who faced life as I did,
Who believed in the life I lived,
Laughed at me, who laughed with me,
Who planned their life with my destiny,
Gave me stress, who gave me pain,
Who were there to balance for the same
Stood for me, never misunderstood me,
Who taught me to live, taught me to love,
Taught me to be strong, In any way, the life evolves,
To those, who promised me to be there,
Whenever life gets difficult to bear
Who taught me the meaning of FRIENDSHIP then
Taught me that life just better when travelled in the same ship,
I don’t know life would have been what?
Better or fair?
IF you were not there?
But neither do I need to think that, nor did I want to care?
Because you were, you are and you will be there.
Friendship | English Poetry
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The Desire | Poetry
The Desire | English Poetry
In a life full of frustration,Each one living here has more and more ambitions,
Some want to love, some wants feel,
Someone wants to make big, some want to heal,
Someone wants to dance, someone wants to sing,
Everyone wants something,
That might not have been heard or seen,
Each one is able, Everyone is capable,
To dance, to sing, to act and to think.
But why it still goes flat?
Why only a few climb the heights, the rest just rest.
It’s because of,
THE DESIRE
The desire, the need,
The desperation, the greed,
Is what makes you succeed.
It’s the climbing hard in the night when others sleep,
It’s when others take rest, you take a leap.
It’s when others just think and you actually act,
When others find it hard, you easily adapt.
When others give up, you give in.
Believing your work –worth believing,
Neither the noise of insult effects nor the applause of praise,
You just go on, giving what your work demands,
With a content heart and smile on your face.
You work for your work, you live for it,
You want it to succeed, you give for it
It’s in your manner, in your act,
In your character, in your deed
That desperation, that greed
That desire, that need
That makes you succeed.
@ramta jogi
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